What a long strange trip it's been....

Bringing this more up to date: here I am "almost 60", still alive (sort of), no longer a professional anything, unless "pain in the ass" counts, and still have a terminal condition.  Honestly, I'm shocked I've lived this long and so are some of my doctors.  In this train wreck of my life after 8 years of dialysis treatment, I've almost died from pneumonia, and had a heart attack (for those who ACTUALLY know me, yes there is a heart in there, no matter what you may have heard.)  So I thought I would continue this a bit, repost some of my old thoughts that had been deleted once upon a time, and add a few new ones, if I can manage to have any...

So....

Here I am again.

For better or worse, poorer (who gets richer?), and death do us part (all too soon, my pretties).

I haven't done this in awhile, and I think I still have some old posts lingering around in my hard drive, so they may appear here, from time to time.  So, let's be about it, shall we?

For those who know me (I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry)(extra credit if you get the reference) and for those who don't, I'm "over 50", male (I checked), a professional (what I won't tell), and autistic.  I also have a terminal medical condition, unless I ever qualify for a transplant, which I don't.  I just don't have the progression diagnosis someone who has cancer has, instead they tell me "your kidneys don't function, we can keep you alive with the dialysis machine, but it's a stopgap.  Without a new kidney I will not survive very long, I just have no real idea if it will be two weeks, two years, or even ten.  However, if I stopped treatment I would likely be dead in a week.  That's a clear enough range for me.

I have worked for 22 years for the same employer, and that employer is being bought out in a couple of months and I will not be retained.  So for some obvious reasons (such as who will hire someone over 50 who has to work from home and go to dialysis 3 days a week?) I will soon be dealing with the wonders of applying for federal disability benefits.  I would probably be bitter about things under other circumstances, but I'm also smart enough to realize it's probably time for me to sit back and see what I can do for myself, rather than expending all my remaining energy for a paycheck.

I started the original "Aspie at Pooh Corner" blog when I was frustrated and freaked out over a delay in my gall bladder surgery.  A couple of days prior to the surgery, my doctor has an ultrasound done of the gall bladder, and noted a "mass" in my right kidney.  After many follow up appointments (and apparent screaming matches between my surgeon and my HMO) I had surgery three months later to remove my gall bladder, and explore my right kidney.  I woke up from the surgery to be told by my wife, "you have cancer" in a flat, emotionless voice.  Well, to be accurate, at that point I'd "had" cancer, since they got it all when they removed about 1/3 of my right kidney.  I started the blog in that period, to keep myself somewhat sane and on an even keel.  It allowed me to say some things I thought needed saying, and allowed me to write some satire posts (which some people took literally, much to my amusement).  After a time, it became more of a burden than a pleasure, and ended up causing me some embarrassment when some items I had written were taken out of context.

Now, a few years down the road, I feel the need to have something to occupy my attention, so here we go again.  Fasten your seat belts, I sure hope this is going to be a bumpy ride....

Asperifically Yours,
Master Aspie Dave